Running away from home. Just like kids.

[neverwrongagent]

Briefings with Saul were getting more and more tense. Carrie could feel the strain on all of them as a real, palpable thing. Beside her, no one had ever had much faith in Brody, which was largely her fault. How could she explain her change of heart without explaining it was exactly that. What was harder was not telling him about how bad it was. Every time she was vague it was a physical pain.

The final straw was a heated conversation about what they would do if he were found out, revealed to be on a mission. They had escape plans, but it was clear very few people in that room gave a damn if they worked. Or if they even existed. She'd been through hell for the man they were dismissing like so much dross and all because... She wasn't that sure why because at this point. It was about Saul, really, and she knew that. That's why when he made a passing comment that made it sound damn like he'd made his decision and Brody didn't figure into it at all, she felt her stomach lurch so badly she almost had to leave the room.

She didn't go to him that night, that would be stupid. She waited a day, all of which was spent wondering when she would throw up. She got there late, just before dark, and sat back to watch the men finish up before meal break. He looked good. Better than when she saw him last, even.

Comments

[posterboymarine]

He sat down at the head of the bed and nodded. "I know they do. And I know how well I take it improves how much they trust me. But sometimes, they just need to knock it off."

Brody sounded tired, both physically and emotionally. He stared down at his food for a few moments before pushing it away. "We started going over extraction plans today..."

[neverwrongagent]

"Yeah?" She managed to sound marginally surprised. "How they look?" Not that he didn't know she'd seen everything before he had. "Any favorites?"

[posterboymarine]

He looked at her for a long time. "Well, the one most likely to work involved me fleeing into the desert and shooting myself..."

[neverwrongagent]

She groaned softly. "Wow, you got two out of that mess? I'm almost impressed, but that second one is off the table." She was proud of herself for staying so even. "It's a big sand box....?" She knew it was bullshit.

[posterboymarine]

"Yeah, it's big when I'm supposed to get out safe. It's small when I'm supposed to get picked up." He rubbed his eyes, then gave her a weak smile. "If I didn't know better, I'd think someone wanted me dead."

[neverwrongagent]

She made a noise. "There's a list. Mostly they'er subtle about it. Mostly." She wasn't going to lie about it to him. "Doesn't matter. I'm getting you out if I have to go in myself. All wild west."

[posterboymarine]

He'd been holding on to the hope that he was redeeming himself. Right up until she confirmed his comment. He stood slowly and went to the window, shaking his head.

"Suicide vest, either way, I guess. Maybe I should have just done it right the first time and saved everyone the trouble."

[neverwrongagent]

She took a deep breath. "If you say anything like that to me again, I will beat the ever living crap out of you. In front of those men." She puffed herself up a little and her voice got harder. "I am getting you out. One way or another. Believe that."

[posterboymarine]

He sighed, then gave her a once over. "I know you'll try, anyway."

[neverwrongagent]

As she finished chewing the bite of food she'd just taken, Carrie got to her feet and moved to stand in front of him. She touched his cheek and waited until she had his eyes. "I don't try. I make things, crazy things, happen." She exhaled slowly. "I won't give up on you and I won't let anyone else."

[posterboymarine]

He leaned into her hand and nodded. "You won't give up on me. But the people above you have. " And he had no idea how to fight that.

[neverwrongagent]

She shrugged. "But I'm the one on the ground. The one with the contacts." She licked her lips. "And I have your back. Better this time. We can do this." She swallowed. "We can."

[posterboymarine]

"I hope so. " But he didn't sound so sure. The last time had not worked out for him so well. Still, he was alive and that was in part due to her.

He wrapped his arms around her and laid his head against her hair.

[neverwrongagent]

Sighing softly, she caressed his head. She had to smile faintly at his bald head. She'd never get used to it. It wasn't him somehow. "I'm asking a lot. I always have. I'm sorry for that."

[posterboymarine]

He had to laugh softly. "I think you enjoy it. " It wasn't a criticism, it was simply a fact, as he saw it.

"If I don't make it back, will you check on my kids from time to time?"

[neverwrongagent]

She blinked hard, then nodded quickly. "Of course. I doubt they want any part of me, but I'll make sure they're okay." Without their father, again. A father who loved them. "They're good kids."

[posterboymarine]

Good was such a relative thing that he had to agree. He squeezed her, then stepped back. "I'm sorry. This probably isn't why you came to see me. "

[neverwrongagent]

She groaned. "Oh God, it really was. I wanted to talk about your kids and the weather and anything else that is normal." She nodded slowly. "We need to talk about reality."

[posterboymarine]

"Reality..." He frowned at that. Reality was going to get him killed and someone's agenda served. He had no use for it, really.

[neverwrongagent]

She nodded slightly. "Yeah. That. I'm not a fan these days." She sat back from him a little and looked down. "They don't care about you. About your kids. They aren't thinking about you at all."

[posterboymarine]

"Tell me something I don't know." He turned back to the window, his food now forgotten completely. "And why should they? I'm a traitor and a terrorist. I'm a means to an end."

[neverwrongagent]

She shook her head. "You're a Marine and a good man." She said it with absolute certainty. More than anyone, she knew the layers of Nicholas Brody, but she saw the good. "And you've been through enough. The least they can do is get you home."

[posterboymarine]

"I don't even know where home is anymore." He'd already been out of his house when he went on the run, so his home was not with his family anymore. The closest he could come up with was the room they were standing in.

[neverwrongagent]

She licked her lips slowly, considering the wisdom of what she was going to say. "Home is where you stop moving. Where you are safe." She shrugged. "Some place quiet."

[posterboymarine]

"Some place quiet. It hasn't been quiet for a long time." He pressed his palm against the window, closing his eyes and just feeling the cool through the glass.